My Mind Was Led Astray

"We must pay more careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away. For if the message spoken by angels was binding, and every violation and disobedience received its just punishment, how shall we escape if we ignore such a great salvation?" This salvation, which was first announced by the Lord, was confirmed to us by those who heard him.  God also testified to it by signs, wonders and various miracles, and gifts of the Holy Spirit distributed according to his will” (Hebrews 2:1-4).

            “Be very strong: be careful to obey all that is written in the Book of the Low of Moses, without turning aside to the right to the let.  Do not associate with those nations that remain among you: do not invoke the names of their gods or swear by them.  You must not serve them or bow down to them…So be very careful to love the Lord your God.  But if you turn away and ally yourselves with the survivors of these nations that remain among you and if you intermarry with them and associate with them, then you may be sure that the Lord your God will no longer drive out these nations before you.  Instead, they sill become snares and traps for you, whips on your backs and thorns in your eyes, until you perish from this good land, which the Lord your God has given you” (Joshua 23:6-7 and 11-13).

            When one is most blessed, that is the time that one needs to pay most careful attention to the Lord’s word and be very careful.  If one does not hate wickedness, does not follow the Lord closely, and thirst for loving the Lord, he stumble and wander about.  If one does not grasp the Word of the Lord by faith and does not pray watchfully to overcome temptations by the power of the Holy Spirit, he will lose his spiritual authority, ability, and honor.  Then it will be too late for one to repent.  Even if one is restored later by grace, one will have wasted so many years.  When our Lord was highly esteemed by God- -the Heaven was opened for him and a voice from Heaven said:  “This is my Son, whom I love, with him I am well pleased” (Matthew 3:16-17).  Then immediately He was tempted.  He fasted for forty days and forty nights and used God’s word as a weapon to defeat all kinds of enticements from the devil.  He overcame the temptation, then He was full of authority to shine upon those who lived in darkness.  Moreover, He overcame to the end, so that He could become the origin of blessings for all nations for generations.  Three conclusions can be drawn from this: 1) How sinister is the cunning scheme of the devil, 2) One must store God’s word in one’s heart abundantly, and 3) One must pray watchfully to overcome by the power of the Holy Spirit.

            Since I did not pay more attention to God’s word, nor was I more careful or always on the watch, I was led astray.  When God just started to use me a little, I was highly esteemed and loved by the believers, especially those older sisters who were advanced in the Spirit.  They gave every care to me just as a loving mother.  Yet I was led astray.  I loved them more than I loved God.  Not fully realizing what I was doing, which led to a long-term weakness and failure in the Spirit; I worshipped them as idols in my heart.  God is a jealous God.  The greatest commandment is for us to love the Lord our God with all our heart and with all our soul and with all our mind and with all our strength.  The second is to love our neighbors as ourselves.  Whenever I met temptation, I failed.  One after another, there were more idols in my heart.  I drifted apart from the Lord and lost the intimacy of God’s presence.  I lost the sweetness of God’s favor, and my spirit fell into the sufferings of being in captivity.  From appearance, I was sanctified and would rather die than to attend the worldly organizations.  Inwardly, I had an illness of  discharge- -strong in appearance but weak in the Spirit. I broke God’s heart.  What was worse was that I did not pray by faith to overcome by the power of the Holy Spirit.  I hope no one will follow the same disastrous way as I did, but press on by grace to obtain more blessings and favors from God.